Just fake the
f*cking team.
Your first ten employees. None of them human. Hire one for $19/mo — or bundle the full floor.
Meet the team
that doesn't exist.
Each one is a real worker — not a placeholder. Hire one. Hire five. Hire all ten and run an agency from your phone.
Sarah
Sends weekly status updates so you never have to draft another one.
James
Invoices, contracts, onboarding. Your whole back-office in one inbox.
Lena
Keeps clients warm between deliverables. Catches churn before you do.
Marcus
Roasts your designs. Catches the spacing crimes you missed.
Hugo
Writes captions, newsletters, and ads. Trained on your exact voice.
Tom
Replies to inbound in 5 minutes. Books discovery calls. Never desperate.
Riley
Schedules social posts. Surfaces what's working. Rides trends.
Ava
Drops a 14-page prospect brief on your desk in 90 seconds.
Owen
Reads contracts. Flags the clauses that would screw you.
Noah
Categorises expenses. Finds deductions. Hands a clean P&L to your accountant.
Three steps
to a team that doesn't exist.
Pick.
Choose one agent. Or five. Or all ten. Each one is a separate hire — no bundle bullshit unless you want it.
Plug.
Connect your inbox. Voice-train in five minutes from your past sent emails. Each agent gets their own working address on your domain.
Pretend.
Your clients meet Sarah. Marcus replies to the design feedback. James sends the invoice. You're at the gym.
Cheaper than
one part-time hire.
Hire one agent or the whole floor. Cancel anytime. No long contracts, no setup fees, no awkward 1:1s.
Solo Agent
- Pick any single agent
- Your own domain alias
- One-tap approval inbox
- Cancel anytime
Solo Agency
- Sarah, James, Lena, Marcus, Hugo
- Cross-agent handoffs
- Custom voice training
- Priority support
Full Floor
- Every agent on the roster
- Voice clones for each
- Weekly team-standup ritual
- Premium personas
Holding Co
- All agents × 3 brands
- Separate domains per brand
- White-label option
- Dedicated onboarding
Real reels.
Real reactions.
Each agent has their own viral moment. Tap a card. Watch the chaos.
I haven't written a project update in 8 weeks. My clients think I'm hyper-organised.
Reel · 0:30
This AI roasts my designs better than any creative director I've worked with.
Reel · 0:30
My new invoice clerk works 24/7 and costs $19/mo.
Reel · 0:30
This SDR booked 47 calls last month. He's not a person.
Reel · 0:30
My clients love our 'account manager.' She's an AI. They don't know.
Reel · 0:30
This bot caught 7 illegal clauses in a contract my lawyer missed.
Reel · 0:30
// reels drop weekly · follow @ghoststaff